December 2004

Well, uh, that's now. I'm not too sure what's going to happen yet :)

November 2004

Uni exams through... things are messed up with the Boy and we try but eventually call off the engagement, I get some temp work and I look into working overseas

October 2004

Few updates as I really focus on end of semester study, and things are getting tougher with the Boy...

September 2004

The Boy goes away for a week, and we are also starting to see cracks appear but mostly we talk them out, and we take a trip to Adelaide

August 2004

Uni in full swing again, full of ups and downs and the Boy starts to get to know my emotional side more intimately

July 2004

Uni results are good, I get a visit from my Mummy and Ric, and the Boy and I decide to get engaged :)

June 2004

I have an unexpected visit from my little sis, and then the Boy arrives, I get through my exams while setting up house and then things are very, very pleasant...

May 2004

We have another beautiful visit in the midst of lots of stress, and the Boy decides to move up here... I move into our house before he does, at the end of the month and it's an 'oh shit' moment

April 2004

Phone on the blink *again*, and I'm worried about Sydney with the Boy but things seem to go pretty well (his family likes me!), but my ordinary life seems less good and I have to book another ticket to Sydney just to stay sane...

March 2004

Back to uni, experiencing assignment stress again... and still with the Boy and things are good, but something's up with the other men in my life for sure...

February 2004

I begin to run up some enormous phone bills as the Taoist and I speak nearly every night, we have some early tests of trust but it's mostly okay, the weather is stinking, stinking hot, and I finally leave fulltime work for uni, yay!

January 2004

A mix of uni and work, being run down and constantly confused, nasty food poisoning episode and my poor body suffers... and a visit from a new friend, the Taoist... and he leaves me as something more than mere friend...

December 2003

First subject back at uni, woohoo! I'm loving it. I have a great Christmas break and I take myself off to Woodford for a special treat... which is a fantastic experience, and results in a new friend.

November 2003

One of the regulars at job #3 decides that I am the hottest waitress ever in the history of that restaurant. I'm kicking arse and taking names man, things are good.

October 2003

I take the plunge... I give notice at work and enrol in uni for 2004, and get very excited! Plus, I get to see the fam... all very good :)

September 2003

I don't write much... but I'm experiencing those coincidences that tell me I'm in the right place at the right time.

August 2003

There's the odd pendulum swing towards feeling lost, but mostly I'm learning now that alone does not have to mean lonely. In fact... I'm really starting to enjoy it.

July 2003

The Greek and I have our one last one last, and I cry another river or three. I wake up to the mess around me, and start to get my finances in order again. I meet Courier, we start pseudo-dating. Most of all, I can finally see the light at the end of the tunnel - I can finally start thinking about uni next year, the grand plan is inching ever closer to realisation...!

June 2003

I move into my lovely new apartment, and have a kick-arse housewarming party. I settle in for spinster life - the Healer is off the scene, and I swear I won't have the Greek over which lasts all of four days. We indulge in some nostalgia, but he has set a date and I miss him already...

May 2003

I seem to be in the right place at the right time, having some good fun with some interesting people... I can't seem to lose myself in it though. Oh, and apparently the Healer loves me. Holy fuck.

April 2003

I'm not too sure what I think of the Healer... I do a few funny things I wouldn't normally do. The work situation settles and all is well again... and the Greek and I are in touch again, and seem to do okay...

March 2003

I'm still crying too much, so I sever ties with the Greek, again, and try to get on with it. Unfortunately, work has noticed that my attitude has been lacking, and I am put on a month's probation. And then... enter the Healer... we date tentatively...

February 2003

I re-discover some of my blessings disguised as friends, particularly the Tall Guy. I do a lot of soul searching regarding my work and my faith... mostly I'm doing okay, except for when I'm not. There's still a bit of a two-steps-forward-one-step-back thing happening.

January 2003

Back to work... and back to the Greek. We resume our friendship, we cross a few boundaries once or twice, we continue to ride the rollercoaster... and reach a conclusion. I think.

December 2002

I go to Adelaide for Christmas and spend the bulk of the time moping and feeling out of step and generally alienating my family... not a good trip. I come to the conclusion that I must sever all ties with the Greek.

November 2002

My Love is back in my arms... briefly. Our conversations lead us to the conclusion that we are going to kill one another if we continue to lose ourselves in one another only to part in a year's time... so we part now... and an emotional rollercoaster ensues.

October 2002

My Love is overseas... the month is long in living (though short in retrospect). I start Pilates and French classes and job #3... I organise myself into a new state of time management, money management, diet management, and generally making the most of every waking moment - and it's fantastic.

September 2002

I doubt, I overcome, there are some little rollercoasters but I am in love, so it's mostly all good :)

August 2002

I experience feelings for another man, and it's okay... it turns out, he feels it too. I discover a waking dream... and quite unexpectedly, I fall in love.

July 2002

I make the official, final, no-turning-back break with the Tall Guy - long overdue. I go overseas for the first time, woohoo! I get a fantastic second job, and meet some great people who remind me that there's always new life out there, after all... and, I survive. I feel good, I feel strong, and I feel proud.

June 2002

I hurt... the Tall Guy and I move out... try different versions of our relationship and leave it at a friendship. I get a flat on my own (with the cat :), I catch up with some long lost friends, I cry rather a lot... the ground feels unsteady and a little crumbly, and I nearly start running... but I stand my ground.

May 2002

I discover that I am actually a "breath of fresh air" and not a ditz after all, and TG and I spend some quality time (but with a review looming, lurking...)

April 2002

Still in the rut, although a scary kind of optimism prevails, mostly... oh yeah, and I discover Star Wars, twenty years after the rest of the world.

March 2002

One night of sublimity basking in the radiance of Augie March and Mercury Rev... but the rest - the six month itch at work, nearly breaking up with the Tall Guy - was rather hellish. Still, I come away with a much needed reminder of my own strength... which I hold, for a while...

February 2002

I fight feelings of futility (again!) and commence the neverending search for fulfilment again... you just have to try, don't you...

January 2002

I enter the year with overwhelming ambivalence about life, work and love, but pull together some plans and start to attack life like a maniac...

December 2001

I hear from my Best Friend for the last time, I sweat the small stuff a lot about work (and nearly quit my fourth job for the year), I have a fantastic visit from Fiernal (though I don't write about that at all :), and I experience my first Christmas in Queensland.

November 2001

Collectively, we elect another conservative government, but don't blame me, I didn't vote for them... my mum gets a diary, I extoll the virtues of luke-warm salty water, I learn to windsurf (and don't suck), and I have sex in a lake - pretty cool.

October 2001

I finally grow up and join the corporate ranks, and find myself with a weekend for the first time since... about forever or so. I find myself spending more time with the Tall Guy, and pondering somewhat...

September 2001

The wider world is changed forever, and Operation Infinite Justice commences. However, life goes on in my part of the planet... I also change my world, and commence Operation Nine to Five.

August 2001

I finally make a very difficult decision and defer my honours degree, and get a second dead end job instead. But, I'm happy about it... mostly.

July 2001

Hooray! I finally start writing again on an almost daily basis, mostly because I'm trying to avoid starting my thesis... I also pee fluoro yellow.

June 2001

The Tall Guy and I clock up a year of survival and some of my puzzle pieces start to fall into place... and I still don't write much.

May 2001

I quit my fourth job for the year, I set an new record by getting another one within three days, and I outlaw philosophy from my Utopian society. And I don't write much.

April 2001

I clock up a mere four entries, I ponder some about the nature of the human soul... not much to see here...

March 2001

I'm a bit tired and down, I don't write too much and I get shunted on to some people's lists of 'weekly reads' ;)

January and February 2001

I begin writing again, I decide to give honours a go and we get a home of our very own.

September to December 2000

In which the relationship finds it's feet and I write very sporadically, even quitting altogether... but of course, returning :)

August 2000

In which I spend two weeks driving back to Brisbane from Adelaide, stopping in all capitals to say hi to friends, and I decide to give love a go. I think.

July 2000

In which I arrive in Adelaide only to want to leave again, I have some conversations on love with an Optimist, and I almost review my opinions of men.

June 2000

In which I open my eyes to what was there all along, I shut the door but the pain still seeps through, and I get my uni degree and leave Brisbane...